Lily Xu: Knitting Yourself Back Together

“It largely stems from my experience as a first-generation immigrant Australian but also the experiences of the community of people around me,” says Xu, who moved to New York two years ago to pursue a master’s degree at Parsons School of Design. “I never grew up with a family beyond my parents. It’s hard to have never really met your grandparents or spoken to them properly. And, while you are sad for your parents’ loss, it’s odd not to feel anything after their passing – that in itself is a loss.”

“The making of the collection is a way to reconstruct memories that do not exist, making intangible emotions and thoughts real through the form of garment making.”

Lily Xu has recently graduated from Parsons’ MFA Fashion Design and Society programme and decided to explore this detachment from her cultural and familial roots in her final graduate showcase. “The collection is an exploration of cultural melancholia, exploring the feeling of longing and incompleteness,” says Xu, who, since moving to New York, has interned at Proenza Schouler and Phillip Lim. “The making of the collection is a way to reconstruct memories that do not exist, making intangible emotions and thoughts real through the form of garment making.”

The collection, titled ‘On Longing’, was inspired by a series of photographs taken by her grandfather, whom she was not close with. The undated images depict unfamiliar places, objects and people which Xu has translated into a poetic line-up of knitwear imagined in muted shades of ochre and red that echo the soft tones of an oil painting and establish an intimate mood.

“The way I work very much starts with fabric exploration,” says Xu, reflecting on where her design process began. “I love being on the knit machine and playing with different ideas and techniques.” For her graduate collection, Xu experimented with printing, which she used to stamp sections of her grandfather’s photography onto ribbons which were then woven into the knits. Xu also printed directly onto her fabrics, forming the final design through intarsia weaving. “There’s almost a scientific element to it in terms of testing things out,” says the designer. “Adding two ends of yarn, or changing the tension just slightly in one row can make a world of difference.”

Once the knits were perfected, Xu then intensively studied how they performed on the body through draping, using the results to develop her final garments. “Even though knit is very limiting as a medium, there is so much within its limitations to play around with, particularly when it comes to combining different stitches or techniques.”

“I was fortunate enough to be able to access a machine during September at a knitwear factory based in New York for a limited time, but as of now the majority of the collection has still not been produced.”

Unfortunately, however, while Xu took great pleasure from the process, she admits she is saddened by the end result, as the pandemic-induced lockdown in early March meant that she could only complete two looks. “I am dependent on specific knit machines that were only accessible through the school studios,” says the designer. “I was fortunate enough to be able to access a machine during September at a knitwear factory based in New York for a limited time, but as of now the majority of the collection has still not been produced.” Still unable to present her collection, does she plan on finishing her line-up any time soon? “If later down the track there is an opportunity to finish my work, I would love to document and showcase it,” says Xu. “But, for now, I’m just going to focus my energy in other areas.”

Despite the unforeseeable setbacks, Xu insists that she is enormously grateful for the opportunity of completing her master’s degree at Parsons. “To have been able to have the time and space to explore and make is almost indulgent,” says Xu, who describes her experience at the renowned college as “a gift.”

“I do not want the pressure of having what I love doing being profitable and monetised.”

When it comes to future plans, Xu has no desire to start her own label, rather, she is hoping to work for an existing fashion house whose values coincide with her own. “It’s a huge commitment, mentally and financially to set up a brand. While I think there is a lot to learn in working within a team where there are people with a variety of strengths and skill sets,” says the designer, who still aims to knit garments in her own time, just for her. “If the occasional friend or stranger likes something that I have made and wants to buy it that would be wonderful and flattering, but I do not want the pressure of having what I love doing being profitable and monetised.”